KILL!
Radio in this country is freaky. Today alone I heard no less than two ads about, I shit you not, premature ejaculation. Point of fact, they used that exact phrase. Seriously, this is radio. Kids could hear this. Yes, I know we can count on the internet and late night TV to take away their innocence, but this is really something. Specifically, something bad. I'd love to be a fly on the (interior) wall of the car with a kid asking his parents what premature ejaculation is though. That would be something to see.
Moving offshore, gossip about Paris Hilton, who has gone and compared herself to Marilyn Monroe and Princess Diana. Now, before I even begin to say with what criteria, first look at the two women in question. On one end, we have Marilyn Monroe, the woman who sang that diamonds are a girl's best friend and the star of the first ever Playboy magazine, among other things. Then we have Princess Diana, God bless her soul. Wow, that's really a match made in heaven isn't it? What in the NINE UNDERLEVELS OF HELL do the two have in common?
Well, hats off to the Hilton girl (that whore), she managed to find what they had in common. Both were blonde and both were icons of the times. True. Here's where it gets freaky. She has compared HERSELF to THEM based on THAT criterion. Basically she's saying that, like them, SHE is the blonde icon of the times. Now, pitchforks at the ready, don't light the torches till we're there. Icon of our times. Young upstart slut. Well, we know we can leave her rotting in a jail cell without food for a couple of years now. She'll just live off her ego.
She also takes offence at being called a dumb blonde. Yes the girl has issues with it. Well, that just makes the list one point longer, nothing lost. And hey, now it's long enough to ~comfortably~ reach the other end of the universe, not just ever so barely. Anyway, she says she's smart and a businesswoman, just like, and I swear to God this is a quote from her, "Jessica Simpson".
Seriously, I don't even have to make up a punchline. It speaks for itself.
Although, now that I think about it, she's a young, blonde, anorexic whorebitchslut who parties all week and lives off her parents money. Hey, she ~IS~ an icon of our times.
I still want to kill her though.
*gor* prayedÃÂ
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2:14 AMÃÂ
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